Why our marriage works (a personal testimony).

This past January, Kathryn and I celebrated our 20th anniversary.  Next to my salvation, marrying Kathryn was the best thing that could have happened to me.  I know for a fact that she feels the same.  Here are the main reasons why our marriage works:

1. Jesus is at the center. We are both believers and both of us understand that our relationship with Him must come before our relationship with each other.

2. We are best friends.  It is true that men need men for friends and women need women for friends but a man and a woman who are married need to be best friends.  Over the years, we have grown close to one another and confide in each other.

3. Our kids are not the center of our universe.  We have four children.  Two of them have married and no longer live with us.  A third is in college and lives with us part time.  The fourth will be a Sophomore in High School next year and will be on his own in no time.  If we made our kids our center, we would be very lonely very quickly.

4. Outside of our relationship with Christ, we are the center of each other's universe.  God designed it that way and I can tell you that is a grand and glorious plan.

5. Physical intimacy is EXTREMELY important.  Once again, it is a Divine design and God intends for married couples to engage in it often.

6. We ALWAYS communicate with one another even when it really sucks to do so.  Yes, we have disagreements and yes, sometimes they are some doosies.  But we have found that silence is detrimental.

7. Both of us look forward to ageing together.  We do not fear or loathe becoming old people, in fact, we both pray that God allows us to live and die together as old people (whatever "old people" looks like).

8. We say, "I Love You" to one another all the time.  A husband and wife can NEVER say that to much to each other.

9. We have both been hurt in the past and we never take each other for granted.  Both of us were married before and both of us suffered immensely.  Accordingly both of us cherish one another deeply

I'm just a breath passing through this life.  And I am thankful beyond words that I get to spend it with Ms. Kathryn.  Thank you Father.